Itsy Bitsy Pink Face Vibrator

Well, that was anti-climatic.
Guess what my trip to Target yielded? For some mysterious reason, every time I visit Target, I almost end up purchasing items that I normally wouldn't even glance at (in other words, items that are reasonably priced under the standards of Capitalism, but insanely expensive when considering common sense and real material value.)
Anyway, I walked away with an ADORABLE gray-and-white sweater. It has a retro vibe, but the loose top and tight waist gives it a refined look. If only I had a camera. Also in my basket was:
the Neutrogena Wave (Duo)!
I know, I know!
The commercials always have an adorable washed-out Disney star smiling and rubbing her face with a pink vibrator. Well, it was just sitting on the shelf, begging to be picked up.
And of course, being the person that I am, I can't splurge on a random facial product that I do not need without writing a review!

My Wave is limited edition pink, like, oh my God. After doing some (too-late) research online, I really wasn't expecting the little thing to work. But, forever the optimist, I ripped over the package with some enthusiasm. I honestly didn't know why I spent seventeen dollars on the contraption, but I suppose I was in an experimental mood -- the same goes for my (New and AWESOME) purple plaid pants.

I won't go into detail about using the thing, since you can probably find that elsewhere. All I have to say is, make sure you don't have a male roommate who easily comes to strange conclusions when a muffled buzzing noise is emitted from the bathroom.

After an abnormally long time staring at my face in the mirror, my sore arm and I have had enough of the Wave. It does not work. Although, of course, that doesn't mean it's a useless piece of trash. It is entertaining, to some degree. Come on, who wouldn't love a bright pink face vibrator? Doesn't it just make you feel pampered and kinky?

Pros:
.Leaves skin feeling tingly and refreshed -- although that might just be the chemicals eating away at my flesh.
.Adorable design. Fits right in my hand.
.Kinda fun to mess around with and hear it buzz.

Cons:
.Takes a while to work up to a lather, and even then there are pathetically little amounts of bubbles. I want my suds!
.Doesn't work. Although that just may be for me, but the white scrubbing pad came off my skin as white as it began with.
.If you're anything like me, who likes taking things apart, the Wave doesn't leave much to the imagination.
.Very wasteful. The cleaning pads are one-use only, and the Wave itself only comes with 21 pads. To be honest, they aren't as phenomenal and amazing as one would expect. They're just the same ol' Neutrogena stuff packed into a little circular piece of fluff.

Little urks:

I am INSANELY tempted to place it on the floor like Vanessa does on the commercial and see if the thing will buzz across the floor. Too bad that would be unsanitary.

My male roommate now looks at me funny.

The wave is fun to play with, and for someone with worse skin than I do, it might even work. If you're looking for a serious skin-cleaning tool, skip the wave and invest on a REAL face vibrator. If you just feel like splurging, the wave is essentially a toy. One which I will probably tire of soon, but, hey, I have a friend who's willing to buy. :]

When the Sun said "Fuck this, man, I'm taking abreak."

I don't know about you, but I think San Francisco is the most amazing place to live in. Ever.

What brought this on, you ask?

Saturday Morning:
7:30AM - Waking up to the tune of my Zombie cell-phone (which has a battery life of about four hours, if I'm lucky.)
7:30-8AM - Yelling at my mother to get back into bed, and stop commenting on everything from my breasts -- or lack thereof -- and the direction in which I comb my hair. (No, mother, I DO NOT have a bald spot on the back of my head.)
8:05AM - realizing that despite nextmuni.com's conviction that the next 28 bus is coming in two minutes, it's actually coming in twelve minutes. There's nothing I love more than freezing on a foggy Saturday morning with an extremely uncomfortable pole digging into my back -- while remaining in the same position for ten minutes straight.
8:40AM - 1PM Why did I suffer through all that? Well, it's all to attend some journalism workshops! :] Interview was mundane, but the people were rather interesting to talk to. Of course, it's a bit scary how the man seems to be balding at a rather young age. Investigative reporting was AMAZING. I felt like a CSI after our mock investigation. I believe I've found my calling!

Anyway, long story short (well... not short. Just, less long...)

Worst parts of the day: Waking up at 7:30 on a SATURDAY (especially after an incredibly tiring Spirit Committee Late Night on Friday), missing the bus, waiting in the cold for ten minutes and probably re-catching a cold, not seeing a single cute guy on the bus. See, contrary to popular belief, there are actually a bunch of adorable men in San Francisco. The thing we young girls complain about is that they are either 1. taken, 2. gay, 3. too old, or 4. dumb as a nail. (Although, I have to say, nails are pretty sharp.)

Best parts of the day: An exciting, although very nerdy, session of "Think like a Journalist!" Where we pretended to be journalists uncovering a huge BART conspiracy. I never knew journalists were so much like detectives. (Like, woah!)

Anyway... I totally lost my train of thought.
Well, I'm off to change the blog layout. :] Catch y'all lat0rz!

Last-minute Summer Thing!

I made another invite! Horrah? ♥


Leave a Comment if you have questions.

So don't be late! Ask Lisa (IM: kawaiilittlepup) for details. Or if you're an AIM hermit, then comment on this post, and I'll pass on the message. :]

F.A.Q. (no, it's mostly Waylon asking.)

Where in Ocean Beach? It's huge.
No idea. Best I can say is... ask Lisa.

Ew. Swim suits?
They're optional.

Do we have to reply?
Swimming, yes.
Movie, yes. Well, that is if you want us to wait for you.
Beach thing: you can just show up with food.
Reply to Lisa. She holds "the list."

Do we have to watch Harry Potter?
Well, I'm skipping the later group myself, and might go in earlier for something else. So, whatever floats your boat.

Is it just me, or do I sound bitter?

I wonder, when you're 15, innocent, naive, and stupid, what do you call someone you "went out" with who never attempted -- okay, not 'attempted', more like 'accomplished' -- anything more than holding your hand?
And none of that tingly "oh my god, homicidal butterflies are going to explode out of my belly and leave me in a bloody and disgusting pile of slush and happiness" feeling.

Yeah, wonderful.

I think this is the... 482th horrible dream-shattering epiphany I've had so far.
No, just kidding. I never really counted. Did I seem the type to? I'm sorry.

I'm glad that I've kept my precious first kiss until now.
Yes, I'm a sixteen-year-old lip virgin living in twenty first century San Francisco, the craziest city in all fifty states. (Also wildest, boring-est, overpopulated, Asianified, and diverse.) I didn't say most dangerous, horniest, loudest, richest, or most overrated. That excludes Vegas, LA, New York, Miami... I would go on, but I'd be driveling.
By the way, I went to the Gay-Pride festival today. I might add "kinkiest" to that description.

Anyway, back to the subject at hand. Snap, snap.

I don't think it should be called a "boyfriend", should it? A close guy-friend? A super-close-but-not-in-the-way-you-are-thinking of guy friend? Yeah... no.
I'm probably overreacting, and by telling myself that, I will under-react, which will cause me to psycho-analyze whether I'm under-reacting, and then overreact again.
Beautiful.

Whatever. I don't have any hostility toward my ex man-friend anyway. Why should I? It's not like he left me empty and soulless, or a pathetic shell of my already pathetic former self. It's not like I can't stand to even breathe without his darly, angelic presence, and all I could do is mope around at home all day, act like a PMSing bitch to my father,then go hanging out like a chirpy school girl with my werewolf best friend, and jump off a cliff for the hell of it.
Oops, driveling again.

By the way, this is a subliminal message. Psst. The Twilight Saga sucks. (And if you laughed at the stupid pun, you're probably a stupider fan. Ew. Rabid Fangirl Cooties.)

Honestly, I could care less. Sure, I'm sorry. (I was a lot more sorry before his subtle expression of his incredible sadness and rage. Oh, boo-hoo.) If you have something to say, then say it. If you don't, then take that melodramatic whining of yours and shove it up your ass. (Unless, of course, you find some strange pleasure in that... then I apologize for my mistake in wording, and please proceed to shove it up another obscene body part.)

Hey, I think I've got my new motto.


I can't believe I actually let myself get dragged around by my stupid imagination and teenage naive. I'm too young for this, and the guys around me are too.
Honestly, high school guys are only "kinda cute", never hot. The ones that show slightest signs of hotness are taken and/or gay.

Oh, how unfair the world is.

The world is never the same as what you read in manga and romance novels. Damn those authors!
(No, I'm sorry. Don't take it to heart. Please continue writing terribly unrealistic, disgustingly cheesy, extremely over-dramatic, wildly romantic, and annoyingly addictive abominati... er... novels.) No really, I'm serious, don't stop. Oh, don't mind the sarcasm is just part of my nature -- the part that's too much of a spineless coward to unleash its full claws to the general every-day public. Damn me and my over-consciousness of self-image!

You know, I should forget about that "self-image". I should look pretty for myself, not eyes that can't appreciate girls (or women) for more than the subject of stupid sexual innuendos -- since those eyes aren't even old enough to see women as a piece of meat. Hey, I'm not really trying too hard anyway. PRIDE IN NO MAKEUP! WHOO! That's right, not a single thing on my face except my trusty Chapstick and moisturizer (with SPF 15 <3). Face it, if Prince Charming was stupid enough to fall for someone as naive (those step-sisters of hers need a bitch-slap) and crazy (schizophrenic bitch who talks to birds and fat faeries, anyone?) as Cinderella, he's probably got a more than a few lose screws under those pretty golden locks of his. Or was he brunette? Hm, I wonder which would be cuter... Ahem. There are no good guys out there, especially not at this age. This feels like when I realized I'll never discover my inner unicorn and suddenly sprout wings and a horn. I'll probably end up married to some typical "Oh, well, I know he's not perfect, but he's good for you. And hey, at least he's not handicapped or deformed." guy and die a disgustingly ordinary old woman. Oh dear, who will take care of my cats?
Lily Allen - Naive (Cover of The Kooks)

I'm alive! Really.

Well, so much for posting everyday. I am still alive. Yay?

Well, so much to say and so little time. XD Gotta do homework. Darnzbockers. Gnite. ♥

Fuck life. Seriously.

OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD!
I hate life, and life hates me. fuck fuckidy fuck fuck.

Okay. Time to rant :3

I had to go to this stupid workshop thing for EHSS (Enterprise for Highschool Students).
Now lets see...
I would've had the workshop during spring break, but before I could sign up for it, I was rushed out of the room. I thought "Oh well, it's okay."
Then I found out that EVERYBODY had signed up for it, and nobody bothered to tell me to sign up for such an important thing. Even the fucking person who literally dragged me out of the fucking room signed up for it, and she didn't even know what it was for.
She dragged me out because her dad is there and didn't want to make him wait.
Five minutes isn't going to kill anybody.
And guess what? I ended up not getting a ride anyway, because there weren't enough fucking space.

Then I rescheduled, and landed a saturday (today). I thought, oh, I'm so lucky.
Since said friend already went, I asked for directions, and was told to get off at "first street".
Of course, I knew I would get lost, so I asked various people to come with me.
My answers were unanimously: "I don't want to." Without any legit reason. What does that translate to?
"You can go by yourself to a dangerous area that you're absolutely unfamiliar with, and I don't give a shit if your sorry ass gets lost or raped. Have fun!"
fine, fine. It's okay. Why trouble someone else when I can survive on my own?

The stop called "First Street" never came up, and I ended up riding the number two bus for an hour and a half, going a FULL CIRCLE.

FUCK.
Why the hell do I even bother to have friends anyway? They always seem to have free time and talk sweet, but when I really need somebody, suddenly everybody is busy.


Should I mention that this happens on a regular basis?


Maybe it's just me for being picky or selfish. Sure. Probably it. You know what else I hate? I can't rant and curse about another human being without somehow wondering if it's actually my fault, no matter how pissed off I am. WHY?!

Oh, and you know how when you're super freaked out and mad, then you call a friend, and they end up talking to someone else while you're on the phone and totally act like it's all sunshine and unicorns while you're sinking six feet under in shit? Yeah. It fucking sucks.

Well, I'm not mad at "said friend" for today, since according to my mother, it's my own damn fault for not having someone to go with me and lead the way, or asking the bus driver for directions.
And you know what people always say when they fuck up your life, "You are your own responsibility, not mine. I didn't tie your down and force you to follow me."
Oh, I'm sorry for trusting a friend.

My workshop is rescheduled on a Tuesday and Wednesday. IN MAY. 4:30. I get off school at 3:30, and my school is in Sunset. It's going to take me way over an hour to get there.

Fuck, fuck, fuckidy, fuck.

Oh, and icing on the cake:

Mom: it's your fault you got lost. Geez, you're always depending on other people. You should've brought a map, or the address to ask the bus driver. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.

My printer is in the repair shop, but she wouldn't know, because everything I tell her is horse shit. A bus driver is not a damn taxi driver, mom. and I don't need you BITCHING to me while I already feel like smashing someone's face against a concrete wall. Then somehow, she got mad at me, then started screaming that instead of trying to get a job, I should be studying and going to tutoring.


You make less than thirty thousand a year mom. I'm not some fucking super genius that's going to magically shit out a full scholarship to some IVY league,so I'm sorry if I want to be a responsible daughter and try to support our family.

By the way, I hate AP Chemisty. But you know why I take three hours out of my Monday every week to sit in the same chair and listen to some demented Asian lady talk? Because I love you mom. So why can't you just stop thinking about yourself and you perfect little fantasy for one fucking second and remember that I'm human?

Everything is wrong.

Laziness

I've always wanted to be a procrastinator, but I never got around to it. ☺

Haven't posted for days! Oh no! So much for posting every day. x]

I finally bought an iPod Touch! I know, I know. Everybody has one now and it's not special... whatever. I like it. :]

Though I know it's totally not good for me ><>

Though if I think about it carefully, and iPod touch isn't all that awesome. The only good APPs you have to pay for, and the free ones aren't too mind blowing. Ah well...

Does anyone have any recommendations?

Nway. My rant is done for today. :3 

-beepbeepbop-

Baking Disaster

I will admit. One of the most difficult things I have done in my life is trying to use a can of cooking spray.

I mean... it seems easy enough. Open; spray.

1. It took AGES to open the damn can. I just COULD NOT figure out how to open it! The cap is clinging onto the can like AIDs to Africans. Okay, that was a rude comment...
Anyway. Eventually, I gave up and asked my mother to help. We pulled, pushed, pressed, yelled... nothing happened. WTF?! Finally, by some miracle, the cap popped off. But of course, that's not the least of my worries.
2. The little knob thing fell off too, so I had to put it back on. Now I have a giant white spot on my desk, and mom is pissed off.
3. I had to spray and re-spray the pan three times. First time there was a hideous white mass... -wipes off- Second time mom screamed at me because I held it 6inches away, instead of 10 inches away. Third time, it still looked strange. WHATEVER.

Well, the pan is sprayed.

I planned on making chewy brownies, but I got tired of stirring the damn thing. Eventually, I gave in and threw in another egg. Horray! Easy stirring! But I've just turned my brownie into a brownie-cake.

I'm sitting here blogging instead of in the kitchen... because I think the oven is talking to me. It started hissing, and soon enough it smelled like something was burning. The oven is empty. -Dramatic music start- In fear of having things blowing up in my face, I'm staying as far away from the stupid machine as possible.

Did I mention I have one of those ancient ovens? I think the thing is older than me. I had to get down on my knees and take the thing apart to light the pilot. Because it was dark, I waved the match around down there until the flame almost hit my fingers to make sure I lit it properly. Now mom is paranoid and constantly nagging me about gas leaks, explosions, and our immediate doom. Yay! Then the stupid cover got jammed, and wouldn't go back in. Again, mom helped push it back in -- after I kicked it and screamed like a PMSing chihuahua. :]

I don't have a normal baking pan, so I have to resort to an aluminum pan. If I'm lucky, nothing will catch on fire or explode. ♥

Whatever... it will work out... and if it doesn't, then all the pretty little children tomorrow at the picnic will be enjoying Shirley's fabulous mystery pastries.

Wow, did I really think like this a year ago? Damn, chick. Grow up.

Translating A Girl

The incomplete and utterly random guide

Note: So, I reread this post and realized how totally ridiculous it is. Wow, it's amazing how much people change.

It's been a widely acknowledged and spread stereotype that girls and guys are as different as oranges and bananas --no pun intended ;). Sure, the armies of men and women have our differences, wars, fights, shouts, bitch-slaps, and many soldiers to chastity... but down to the soul, we're one and the same. Man, Woman. Male, Female. Without women, males would not exist [unless, of course, humans resort to hermaphrodite-ism] Without "male" or "man", there would be no "woman" or "female." See, we complete each other (well, in English at least).

What does a Sixteen-year-old lip-virgin have to say about relationships? Honestly, what a relationship really takes is the mind. I can preach about it, or I can get to the point of this blog post. x] I've just been feeling random, and felt inspired to do this. Feel free to call me on it if I'm wrong, since these are only behavior patterns I've observed from myself and friends. :] For the sake of my self-image, I'd like to say that these are not ALL from experience, and many are from friends.

Well, let it rain flowers and unicorns! :D

PMS.
Premenstrual syndrome. Seriously guys, suck it up. A PMS-ing girl isn't nearly as horrible as guys describe it. I'm going to refrain myself from rampaging on about how unfair it is that girls have to suffer through this every month (or if you're lucky, every three or twelve months) and spare your sanity. Sure, girls do get more emotional and sensitive, but come on. She's just being more HUMAN. If guys could grow more sensitive and mature, the world would be a better place.

Situation 1:
girl: "I feel like shit, I'm PMSing."
guy: "Thanks for the warning."

Great job dick, you just dug your own grave. What kind of an ass tells someone who's feeling shitty "oh thanks, I'll just go away now and let you wallow in yourself."

Situation 2:
girl: "I feel like shit, I'm PMSing. UGH."
guy: "Aw, it's okay. It'll pass. :]"

Nice guys are always rewarded. ♥

Helpful hints:

Whenever a girl is feeling horrible, she needs to be reminded that she is loved and cared for.
If your girl is mad or pissed off at something, throwing in a lame joke would usually end up with you sitting dazed and wondering where the hell that (her anger directed at your face) came from. Never, and I mean, NEVER insult her. I mean, what the hell? Sure, maybe your girl's super chill and would brush it off normally, but when somebody is pissed off... the slightest thing can end up with your foot up your ass.

Lisa Truong:
"Be a man and face her, don't act like the chickens you are. At least put up the facade that you aren't a coward and try to calm her down! Don't just run away because you're "scared to piss them off even more."

When you don't know what to say, just reassure her that you're there. Don't stay silent.
Sure, we're not all magicians. We can't snap our fingers and make everybody happy. However, when somebody is in ticking-time bomb mode, "giving her space" isn't the smartest thing to do.
Example: You accidentally kick a bear in the nuts, and now it's insanely pissed off at you.
What do you do?
A guy's instinct is to run away.
The bear isn't going to get any less pissed off, if not more.

The difference between a girl and a bear is, the bear will chase after you growling. A girl will begin questioning herself and wonder what she did that made you run away, and if she overreacted to a simple kick. Eventually, she will feel even more like shit, and you're not there to help her, because you dropped your balls and ran away.

If a girl says stop, she means STOP.
Usually, unless she is laughing, smiling, or expressing any other forms of happiness and consent, when a girl tells you to stop... you stop.

Girls want and need respect, but they're too courteous to demand it.
Girls like it when guys are protective -- it's sexy, but not grandfather protective. Personal space.
Also, never belittle a girl just because you feel like it. Sure, it's okay to slip once in a while -- it's what teenagers do, belittle each other. However, if you can consciously stop it, then STOP IT. Don't say something that you KNOW will hurt, then pass it off as "Just kidding." It doesn't make it hurt less. Also, if you do it repeatedly... eventually, that "Just kidding" will turn into a "I don't have enough balls to take your anger, but I'm too proud to say sorry... so I'll just pretend I'm kidding and hope you don't stay angry."

Girls like to be surprised.
It's more exciting that way, and if it's nothing too stupid or harmful, she's likely to forgive you.

Girls treasure their handiwork.
If a girl bakes you something, or makes something for you... treasure it like it's your life. Sure, maybe a paper star is nothing to you, or her cookies taste like dead people... she made them for you. ANYTIME somebody takes time out of their own life and create something out of their own effort especially for you, the LEAST you can do is to keep the item, if not appreciate it.
example: If a girl folds a bunch of stars for you in the middle of class just because she missed you all of a sudden, they mean a lot more than you may think. Sure, she probably wouldn't be too phased if you accidentally lose them or forget they exist, but it's going to stay on her mind. Eventually, if you don't appreciate and respect a girl or her hard work, they're never going to meet your hands again.

Girls take insults to heart. Sure, we can brush it off, but after you keep repeating something, they start wondering if you mean it. If once or twice you slip out "omg, you're so insane!", we'll be cool with it and maybe laugh along. But if you go "hey crazy," or "stop being so crazy," or "crazy, what's up?" or use that term in any regular setting... it's not funny anymore. Especially if we're in a bad mood, even the slightest slip feels like Niagara Falls. Bottom line, don't let any insulting word become a regular habit and a way of addressing her.

Girl Psychology

Despite what men say, women are actually very sensitive creatures. We filter what we say, second-guess ourselves, and by our motherly nature, place others before ourselves. [except for super selfish bitches.]

Maybe it's just me, but I hate the smell of B.O. Sure, all your sweaty basketball buddies have no problem with it, but a girl's nose is sensitive. It doesn't mean you have to smell like fruits and cupcakes all the time, but when YOU start to smell yourself, it means people around you have smelt you AGES ago. Seriously guys, deodorants were invented for a reason.
Sure, some may argue that I mind because I am not a sporty person. Believe me, girl body odor is, simply put, BETTER than guy odor. Also, by Highschool, even the most disgusting girls have developed good/adequate hygien.

Some guys say girls get angry for no reason, and it's impossible to predict or know if and when they did something wrong.
That's bullshit.

Basically, if you do something to her, and she laughs -- it's good. If you do something to her, and she ignores you, she's either tired, doesn't care, or angry. If you do something and she does it back (without laughing), it means stop doing that and NEVER do it again. If you do something to a girl, and she glares at you then ignores it, does it back in a mean way, etc.; she's had enough. It's all very difficult to explain, so...

Here are some possible scenarios:

Just Fun:
1. guy: -pokes girl repeatedly-
girl: -ignores-
guy: -pokes again-
-poke-
girl: -laughs- stop! -pokes back-

2. guy: -throws something at girl- [personally, I DESPISE having things thrown at me (especially at my head), but I do have friends who don't mind -- which I will never understand.]
girl: -reacts, but doesn't do anything-

OR

guy: -throws something at girl-
girl: -throws back-
-throw war starts-

3. guy: -calls girl a name- (seriously, this is so immature.)
girl: -laughs it off, calls it back-

You Screwed Up:

1. guy: -pokes girl repeatedly-
girl: -ignores-
guy: -pokes again-
-poke-
girl: STOP!

OR

guy: -pokes girl repeatedly-
girl: -STABS back-

2. guy: -throws something at girl-
girl responds with seriousness: "What the hell?" or "Did you just throw that at me/ my face?"

(By the way, I don't know if this opinion is shared, but I hate getting things thrown at my face. It feels as if the other person is saying I'm ugly, or my face is worthless -- thus deserves to have random and unsanitary objects thrown at it.)

OR

guy: -throws something at girl-
girl: -throws back with force- (It might not feel hard to you, but if a girl actually uses force to throw it, she wants it to hurt.)

3. [this is a special case, where the girl laughs even though she is pissed/sad. This is because she wants to pass it off casually and not seem awkward. Girls are usually reluctant to show their discomforts, in fear of becoming "high maintance" or patronizing.]

guy: -calls girl a name-
girl: -laughs nervously- that's mean!

OR

guy: -calls girl a name-
girl: -says it back seriously-

Or

guy: -calls girl a name-
girl: -ignores it repeatedly and refuses to acknowledge your existence every time that word comes out your mouth-

Well... I think I've written too much... Although I do agree that some girls can be overdramatic, annoying, and downright high-maintance, but guy's are doing their full part either. This blog covers some basic human courtisy, and although not all of these tips/rants will apply to you and/or your relationship, thanks for reading. :]

Recap:

Girls are human beings.
When a girl is in a bad mood, attacks she usually shakes off can dig into her flesh and make her bleed.

Girls are (mostly) Subtle.
When a girl complains, it's either because
1. she's married to you -- either complain now or live miserably forever, or
2. she's already took it silently for a while, and finally got fed up with you.
We usually think things over MANY times, and often we will wonder if we're in the wrong before blaming the guy. Of course, I'm not saying we're saints --sometimes we decide that it's the guy's fault without knowing his story. However, if we knew both sides, we would consider them.
Also, for fun things (like anniversaries and gifts), girls never demand them. They hint at what they want, and drop subtle reminders. If a guy picks up on the hint, it shows his sensitivity and how much he cares about her. Sure, if you forget a birthday or anniversary you may never hear about it -- but in your book, an ugly black dot is there.


Never do to a girl what you wouldn't do to yourself or your tightest guy bud.
Would you insult yourself or your best friends when you/they are feeling like shit?
Would you walk away from a friend when he's pissed?
Would you call your best friend some retarded name, even after he's told you he didn't like it?
Would you throw something at your own head repeatedly just because you're bored and feel like it?
Would you throw something at your own face at all?
Hell, you probably would remind your best friend "Dude, you're awesome." or "I love you man." So do the same for your girlfriend. Don't assume that she can read your mind.

Now I leave you with a few sample dialogues:

guy: "Are you mad at me?"
girl: "No, why would I be?"
Translation:
"Yes, you moron, I'm mad. I'm not mad at you enough to say it to your face, since I'm still not sure if it's my fault or your fault, but it doesn't mean I'm not pissed off. Also, maybe you can finally grow more mature and figure things out without me having to spell them out."
If she's really mad, insert several swear words within that monologue.

girl: -seriously- "Stop it."
Translation: "You know what? I've had enough. Why don't you stop this -rainbows- before I rip out your ---sunshinesandunicorns--?"

girl: "That's mean."
Translation: "Why would you even say something like that to me? Do you know what you just did? Do you realize how insensitive and plain STUPID that was? Do you have any bit of humanity?"

The second image contains home-made crochet figures by Vivian Tang.

Imadoki

Oh, I almost forgot to post today!

I'm rereading the manga Imadoki.
It's very cute, funny, sweet, and romantic. That's Yuu Watase for ya! :]
Though I've realized that I've outgrown her art, and I no longer worship her style like I worshiped Fuushigi Yugi. Still, she is a very talented and awesome mangaka who I respect. :D

Well, this is my short post to keep up with my mission of posting once per day. ;]
(And of course, a video to end.)

image from kawaiinot.com

The Dark Knight

I finally watched "The Dark Knight" today.

It. was. EPIC.

The trailers DID NOT do it justice. I didn't go watch it in theaters because the trailers seemed retarded. Although I've always been a fan of the comic, but Spiderman taught me that Hollywood had a knack for turning classics into roadkill. Therefore, I decided to skip the screenplay of TDK back in '08 -- I will probably regret that decision for the rest of my life.

I'm so amazed and blown away by it that I'm absolutely speechless. My heart is POUNDING. I so regret missing it on the big screen. I can only imagine the amazing sound effects and seeing the gigantic face of Heath Ledger painted new by insanity. I honestly did not expect the Joker out of him.

TDK in theaters would've probably been one of the best two hours of leg cram of my life. But instead I caught the best movie I've watched in all my sixteen years on a 22inch screen with a screaming mother as the background. Oh well, it was still amazing. I would absolutely watch it over, and over, and over, and over. I can't even gush on how amazing it was because, for once, I can't put together enough randomly strung together metaphors to describe how amazing the movie is! I think this is the first time in my life I've felt the urge to worship a moving picture (granted that nobody is holding me on my ancient fetish with Pokemon).

I can't breathe...

I mean throughout the whole two hours, my heart never stopped racing for a single second. It was worth EVERY SINGLE millisecond. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!! I think my low blood pressure just leveled itself.

The only thing that bothered me was his voice when he's in costume. It makes him sound constantly constipated.

Either way. EVERYBODY was awesome. The Joker, oh my god. I'm sure after this role, the bastard died happy. I think Heath Ledger just jumped right next to Johnny Depp as the most talented actors on my list. It takes serious WOAH to pull off a role like that. [Though technically, the roll pulled him off.]

Now I have this weird adrenaline rush.

It only lasted two hours, but it felt like forever. I don't think there's ever been another movie so filled with mindless explosives, ruthless violence, twisted criminal psychology, and pure oh-my-god-ness as this movie. It was PERFECT. Even the soapy scenes were well-placed and dramatic. There were zero breathing room in it. whoo~ I think I need to chill.

New favorite movie. Right there.

The Infamous Printer Malfunction

Phi = phai, or phee? I guess the world will never know. :]

I ♥ my Lowrider Skullcandies. If they weren't covered in digusting bacteria and would possible render me immobile through electric shock, I would lick them all day. ;] 

For a teenager my age, giant headphones are a Godsend. Headphones in, world out. Goodbye mother, while you feed your blood pressure and scream about how much you wish I would give you a heart attack just so you can prove that I have the potential to kill you one day if I don't behave...  I will listen to overdramatic emo lyrics and twitch in my chair to repetitive drum abuse. OH YEAH!

Well, it's 10:30 PM and I am, once again, staring mindless at the computer screen. Got home around 6-ish. I ATTEMPTED (no, seriously, I tried) to outline my AP Chemistry book and organize my notes into something more... readable. I found this very useful chart I wanted, so I ran over to my scanner to photocopy it.

This is the same scanner that ate my English essay, turned my Chemistry report purple (though it was a very pretty splatter), and crashed into my knee when I attempted to use it as a footrest.

A billion printer jams, one ink cartridge explosion, and an angry mother later, I still love my three-in-one piece of plastic and technology. Then again, there's a thin line between love and hate.

 A printer is like a baby. Sometimes it works like a charm, and everybody's happy. Sometimes, you even want to hug it and go "Aww, that's a good printer-baby." (No? Geez, it deserves some credit for spitting out your five page essay at lightening speed.) Then other times, you just want to throw it on the floor, jump on the piece of shit, smash it into the wall, beat it senseless with a baseball bat, swear in every language you know to it -- even though it wouldn't understand you, and smash it through a window (and maybe hit someone hard enough to make them bleed). 

Oh, wait, I just A.D.D.'d. What was I talking about? Right, AP Chem. So anyway, I went to photocopy it... for some reason the black one comes out blank, and the colored one comes out "ERROR". The cartridges are both in there and relatively full. What the fudgemonkies?!

So I pull a Inspector Gadget on the thing (haha, that is totally not the right allusion). An hour later, I look like I just had a steamy night with a squid, while my printer is still "ERROR." I ALREADY CHECKED THE DAMN CARTRIDGE AND PAPERS! NOW PRINNNNNT! For some reason, I couldn't get the damn machine to believe that there are indeed ink cartridges in it. God, this is like denial for cancer patients. 

So after a while, it FINALLY accepted the fact that there were cartridges, and began to print.

Heart racing, excitement, OMG FINALLY---

the shit came out blue, streaked, and faded.

#$@*$^$%@.

FML.

So. My page isn't photocopied, I still can't decipher my Chem notes, I'm probably going to fail the AP exam because my professor is a worse teacher than a crackwhore preaching abstinence; and my printer is still sitting on its little shelf, despite the hundred deaths I've played out for it in my mind. (Yes, I managed to limit myself to a hundred).

There's still the party on Wednesday... I need to buy food and/or cake mix. ><

I lost my pencil case today. God damn. Then when I found it again, my favorite pen, pencil, and one-of-those-really-awesome-clickable-erasers-that-look-like-a-pen were missing. What the hell?

I realize that 70 pages isn't nearly enough for to outline my Chem notes.

So tomorrow, I have to drag my lazy butt all the way around San Francisco and pull money out of my own shallow little pocket to finish my shopping list. [Why aren't there any damn Targets or Walmarts in SF?] Also, being Asian, my office supplies are coming from Chinatown for a dollar or two each, not Office Depot for six. DUH. I think Safeway is having a sale on cake mix...

Damn damn damn damn. So much for dragging myself around the house like a zombie all day, like my usual Saturday routine.

Oh, did I mention Firefox bailed on me? Seriously. All of a sudden it pulled an Internet Explorer and commited suicide. Now I'm using the new Google Chrome. Chrome's actually pretty cool, though a lot less fun than firefox -- especially for people like me, who abuse plug-ins. Ah well.

Well, on the bright side, it's SPRING BREAK! ☺

Coin Operated Boy - Dresden Dolls

Spring Break Party

[click the picture]

THIS EVENT IS INVITE-ONLY.
You can IM to request me or Lisa to add your name to the guest list.

I made the invite, hehe.
Lisa will probably be distributing these, but I'm posting it here for the people who didn't get one [and should have].

Conflicker?

What's the deal with this conflicker thing?
Supposedly, it's the new apocalypse.

Its wikipedia tribute boasts Conflicker's amazing abilities to piss off not only the average technologically retarded American, but also puff-breasted NASA-grade government specialists. Can I hear a w00t w00t?

What's so fun about making millions of people around the world scream "FUCK!" and smash their computers into the wall? You wouldn't be there to see their frustration, and the only satisfaction you get as a creator are the fifteen hundred thousand pages of results that pop up when you google: "conflicker". Well, of course, it is quite rewarding sitting in your mother's basement and laughing evilly at the success of your master plan of world domination. Totally. Whatever floats your boat.

Supposedly, the internet world was supposed to end on April 1, 2009. It's April 2nd, babe.

Not that I haven't been beaten by annoying viruses before, I just find it ridiculous that everybody is tripping over their own fingers and keyboards just to escape a virtual threat whose power may be simply blown out of proportion by the media and the masses. Ever heard of a riot?

April Madness

I found this super awesome javascript that makes typing text... too bad I can't post it as a blog entry. Stupid blogger. x.X
Oh well, I'll find another way to spam randomly.

Anyway. Today was boring, as usual.
I spent so long debating whether to try Chicken Katsu Misubi, or Spam Misubi. Really, who came up with Spam Misubi? That has to be the most RANDOM food ever. It's super fat and salty, but god damn it, it tastes like heaven! (If heaven is overly-processed meat on top of dry rice and wrapped in cheap seaweed.) They were both awesome. :]
ily for buying it, even though now I have to find another way to sneak the money back into your pocket. :] ♥

Finally figured out the comment format thing. Horray! :]

Sorry, Sorry by Super Junior. This song kills my braincells >.< but my stupid friend got me addicted to it. Sigh. It does get annoying after a while, but when I'm feeling bored and need a pick me up, this song really sends my braincells screaming for mercy. :]

About Me. ♥

Well, I thought it was about time I made a blog, so here it is! :]
Finally, a place where I can rant randomly and endlessly about pointless subjects!

Well, I'm just an average high school student. Really, I wish that I was different. If only I could extend my fangs to below my lips -- given that I don't pierce myself by accident and spend the next two hours swearing; or grow wings and fly -- if I don't crash into any windows, which, I probably would. But no, I'm just normal, plain, and plain normal. Whoo! Exciting. ♥

☺ Time for the myspace-style survey! I swear, those things are made purely for stalkers.

Name: Well, my last name is Xu (which I'm totally in love with, by the way. I will personally hunt you down, knock on your door, and hand you a cookie if you can pronounce that.)
Anyway, my first name starts with S and rhymes with Shialee. (No, my middle name does not start with an E)
So, you can call me Shialee, though I will be signing with S.Xu.
Age: I am 16, Aquatic Chicken. [That's right, I'm at that age.]
Sex: Yes please! No, actually, stay away from me.
Location: I think I'm on Earth, but the little people wouldn't shut up about Mars.
Hobbies: Well, this is going to be a long list...
Writing - obviously, I have a blog!
Art - like, literally anything relating to art. Architecture, sculpture, painting, sketches, computer generation, graphic designing, photography, literature, dance, music... sometimes I even consider philosophy an art.
I have experiences in art here and there (no, literally, here and there.) I have been an aspiring novelist and sketch-artist for as long as I have been alive.
Staring at the Sky - it's a lot more productive than you would think.
Daydreaming - this too.
Running - I like running, though not competitively.
Water sports
Personality: ookay. I'm a bit bored of this thing. :x
As you can tell, I like to share info. about myself. Though I'll stop writing now, before my fingers fall off and get attatched to the keyboard. :]

Well, now that you know all about me and I know nothing about you, lets get this rock rolling! :D